Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Peter - Carepage - July 2nd, 2008

July 2nd - today celebrates a year since Peter had his open heart surgery. It has been a whole year…and I reflect on where we are today and where we were then, and all the traveled miles in between. First of course I thank God for the incredible blessing of Peter and his health. July 2nd, 2007 - Little scrawny green-haired mohawk Peter Bear. Prepping Peter for surgery. Smiling at him as he stared into my eyes reassuring me all would be ok. The smallest robe they had being way too big for him. He had yet to celebrate his second month. John and I doing all we could to be brave, and believing that this surgery would make everything better. The gut wrenching army of butterflies in my stomach as the time finally came when we had to hand Peter over and watch them walk through the doors and down a hall. Sitting in the waiting room wondering what the other families waiting were there for – what were they hoping for this day? We learned the power of friendship and the comfort that a long hug can give us – I am still so thankful to April, Chris, Tita and Ben for coming to be with us on that day. To share insight, humor, stories and laughter…but ultimately they shared something that I can’t describe – a reassurance and comfort that only friends can give you in a large sterile environment. All the people in the hospital, their stories, their fears and their hopes…all of us feel lonely in that moment but for the comforting presence of family and friends. And of course we come back to Peter, out of surgery like a trooper and on the road to recovery. And here we are today. July 2nd 2008. Peter is more than double in size. Still on oxygen and the challenges of pulmonary hypertenstion. He is sitting, crawling and really great at hugs. He loves his siblings and you can see the anticipation of fun when they walk into the room. He is a master snuggler who makes bad days beautiful, and can light up a room with a smile. He is eating without the need for tubes. He works on exercises and is very curious. He likes to screech and sing songs. His appetite improves if you sing “Ba Ba Black Sheep”. When I landed in Phoenix today it was such a familiar setting. For so many years with PacifiCare my travels brought me to or through Phoenix. I know where every Starbucks is! I looked around and realized that while familiar it was also different. The America West planes replaced with US Airways…Pizza Hut and Cinnabon in the same places, but some gift stores changed…magazine racks in the same place, but the faces smiling off the covers have changed. And then I realized that despite how I felt for the last year – the world kept on turning, and changing. That while I wasn’t looking because I was so focused on what was going on within the four walls of my home, the four walls of doctor’s offices and the four walls of hospitals – the world kept going on outside. Each place a mix of familiar and new…like a favorite book with a new chapter. Then I realized it mirrors our family. In some ways we are that familiar old book – well read and worn around the edge that naturally opens to the faded pages of our favorite memories shared over and over again. But we too have changed. We are all a year older, hopefully a bit wiser and definitely a bit softer around the edges. We know the fear of loosing a child, and the relief of having him in our arms. He still has the baby smell of a year ago, yet bigger and heavier in our arms. The picture on the cover of our family book has changed over the years as we’ve added the blessing of a child to our growing family, the book gets thicker as memories get added to the pages, yet we know there still is so much to come! So like the airport that is familiar but different, growing, changing, moving – filled with so many faces and so many stories, we hope too that our book of life will grow and be filled with warm memories, lots of laugher, full of love and a few more miracles of of good health. God bless you! ck